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No More Mr. Nice Guy

Many people think they are getting along great with their spouses, while the spouses feel they are targets of abuse, blackmail, and worse. It is impossible even for a long-time member of a happily-married couple to see the world exactly as his or her spouse does.

Divorce is often the result of a breakdown of communication. Silence does not always mean contentment, and exaggerated volubility may hide an effort to catch you in a lie or to make you reveal things better kept secret.

If marriage sometimes fails to bring out the best in people, divorce nearly always brings out the worst. The husband you knew as mild in manner turns out to have quite an aggressive streak when his thoughts are expressed through the intimidating voice of his attorney. Matters long dormant or supposedly patched up to the complete satisfaction of both parties re-emerge as grenades that make you re-examine everything you thought you knew about your married life in a completely new light.

People who are sued for divorce sometimes think about taking the easy way out: “She can have the children, the house, and the bank account. Just let me out of her way.” The problem is that divorce is not just an argument about the conduct of your life up to now, but also a battle to shape your future.

If you don’t recognize yourself in the harsh images presented in your spouse’s divorce suit, it may be because the charges therein are missing important context and mitigating factors that would completely transform the situation in the eyes of an impartial observer.

In the vast majority of divorce cases, there is no black and white statement of the facts that does justice to the truth as lived by the spouses. Everyone deserves a decent chance for a stable and secure future.

Passive acceptance of a disgruntled spouse’s allegations is rarely the best way out of a situation that is mostly unwinnable no matter how you slice it. Whatever you think of yourself as a person, and however much you may blame yourself for the collapse of your marriage, you have rights that cannot be easily dismissed.

Attorney Carmina Hirsch has years of experience battling and negotiating effectively with the crème de la crème of hyper-aggressive divorce lawyers in the state of Connecticut. Whatever may be thrown your way, she can help you defend your position and maybe even mitigate the flames your spouse tries to light.

Hirsch Legal, LLC is a Shelton-based firm serving divorce and family law clients in New Haven and Fairfield County (Bridgeport, Milford, Danbury). Call to schedule your consultation today.

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